Ghosted | Review

In no moment is the absolute inadequacy of Ghosted more apparent as a movie than in its first half hour, when we follow the uptight Cole (Chris Evans) as he meets and falls in love with the impulsive Sadie (Ana de Armas) during one of those first dates that only happen in movies: without any awkwardness, they open up unrestrictedly to each other as they enjoy perfect outings and meals together and decide to spend the night together. Romantic fantasy has its place in cinema, but it needs to be sold with some kind of charm in front of or behind the camera, and that's simply not the case here.

Dexter Fletcher, who did an enchantingly creative job with Rocketman, directs these early scenes of Ghosted in a mode even less interesting than autopilot. The dialogue between Cole and Sadie is filmed and edited without any sense of rhythm, the unremarkable locations around Washington D.C. are photographed without any trace of awe. In short, the movie buries the scarce chemistry between Chris Evans and Ana de Armas under layers and layers of a mediocrity that's even more insidious than usual. I'm talking about that kind of aggressive mediocrity that distracts the viewer instead of just smoothing out the product for the lowest common denominator.

Even worse is that this initial segment of Ghosted proves to be quite representative of the movie's modus operandi as a whole, even though the plot quickly veers away from the romantic comedy terrain. This is because Cole discovers, after some time without news from Sadie, that the woman he fell in love with is a ruthless CIA agent feared by criminals around the world. Of course, our protagonist ends up being kidnapped by Sadie's dangerous enemies, and the two find themselves entangled in a global espionage plot. Think True Lies or Knight and Day, but with the genders of the characters reversed and much (much) less charisma.

Here, the usual narrative arc of the couple who go from sniping and disaffection to mutual understanding and overwhelming passion is mixed with the sensibilities of two pairs of screenwriters: from Chris McKenna and Erik Sommers (Spider-Man: No Way Home, Ant-Man and the Wasp), the movie takes the action plot with generic heroes and villains, without any hint of political consciousness in its portrayal of the CIA; from Paul Wernick and Rhett Reese (Deadpool, Zombieland), Ghosted inherits some clever conceptual jokes - pay attention to a scene full of special guest appearances - and the vague theatricality of the supporting characters' characterization, especially Adrien Brody's villain and Cole's parents, played with blatant irony by Amy Sedaris and Tate Donovan.

Beyond these flashes of self-awareness, the movie only really takes off (and doesn't fly very high off the ground) in two action scenes, one in the first act and another in the third. Both use their eccentric locations - a tourist bus in Morocco and the rotating structure atop a luxury skyscraper - to create physically interesting, decently choreographed confrontations and directed with at least some of the visual audacity that director Fletcher showed in previous projects. It's as if the competent but sleeping conductor of a runaway train suddenly wakes up for a stretch of the journey, making the necessary stops at a few stations.

Of course, after that, the conductor falls asleep again, and maybe it's our fault for not jumping off the train at the first opportunity. In one way or another, this at once turbulent and agonizingly boring journey has a curious effect: Ghosted will make you miss the lukewarm blockbusters of the big Hollywood studios, which at least have the decency to be mathematically calculated to create forgettable entertainment

In no moment is the absolute inadequacy of Ghosted more apparent as a movie than in its first half hour, when we follow the uptight Cole (Chris Evans) as he meets and falls in love with the impulsive Sadie (Ana de Armas) during one of those first dates that only happen in movies: without any awkwardness, they open up unrestrictedly to each other as they enjoy perfect outings and meals together and decide to spend the night together. Romantic fantasy has its place in cinema, but it needs to be sold with some kind of charm in front of or behind the camera, and that's simply not the case here.

Dexter Fletcher, who did an enchantingly creative job with Rocketman, directs these early scenes of Ghosted in a mode even less interesting than autopilot. The dialogue between Cole and Sadie is filmed and edited without any sense of rhythm, the unremarkable locations around Washington D.C. are photographed without any trace of awe. In short, the movie buries the scarce chemistry between Chris Evans and Ana de Armas under layers and layers of a mediocrity that's even more insidious than usual. I'm talking about that kind of aggressive mediocrity that distracts the viewer instead of just smoothing out the product for the lowest common denominator.

Even worse is that this initial segment of Ghosted proves to be quite representative of the movie's modus operandi as a whole, even though the plot quickly veers away from the romantic comedy terrain. This is because Cole discovers, after some time without news from Sadie, that the woman he fell in love with is a ruthless CIA agent feared by criminals around the world. Of course, our protagonist ends up being kidnapped by Sadie's dangerous enemies, and the two find themselves entangled in a global espionage plot. Think True Lies or Knight and Day, but with the genders of the characters reversed and much (much) less charisma.

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Here, the usual narrative arc of the couple who go from sniping and disaffection to mutual understanding and overwhelming passion is mixed with the sensibilities of two pairs of screenwriters: from Chris McKenna and Erik Sommers (Spider-Man: No Way Home, Ant-Man and the Wasp), the movie takes the action plot with generic heroes and villains, without any hint of political consciousness in its portrayal of the CIA; from Paul Wernick and Rhett Reese (Deadpool, Zombieland), Ghosted inherits some clever conceptual jokes - pay attention to a scene full of special guest appearances - and the vague theatricality of the supporting characters' characterization, especially Adrien Brody's villain and Cole's parents, played with blatant irony by Amy Sedaris and Tate Donovan.

Beyond these flashes of self-awareness, the movie only really takes off (and doesn't fly very high off the ground) in two action scenes, one in the first act and another in the third. Both use their eccentric locations - a tourist bus in Morocco and the rotating structure atop a luxury skyscraper - to create physically interesting, decently choreographed confrontations and directed with at least some of the visual audacity that director Fletcher showed in previous projects. It's as if the competent but sleeping conductor of a runaway train suddenly wakes up for a stretch of the journey, making the necessary stops at a few stations.

Of course, after that, the conductor falls asleep again, and maybe it's our fault for not jumping off the train at the first opportunity. In one way or another, this at once turbulent and agonizingly boring journey has a curious effect: Ghosted will make you miss the lukewarm blockbusters of the big Hollywood studios, which at least have the decency to be mathematically calculated to create forgettable entertainment