Twelve years have passed since the last Scary Movie was released. After Scary Movie 5 received an abysmal 4% approval rating on Rotten Tomatoes, you'd think that the powers that be would lay this franchise to rest. But, unsurprisingly, nothing matters in Hollywood but money. And since all five Scary Movies were financial successes, it's only right that they go back to the well one more time.
This next instalment in the series is off to a promising start, with the Wayans Brothers being involved in its creation. The Wayans Brothers left the franchise after Scary Movie 2, but Marlon Wayans took to his Instagram to confirm their return and announce that June 12, 2026, is the movie's release date. That gives us plenty of time to speculate, ruminate, gesticulate on what movies they'll choose to spoof. One thing that is all but confirmed is the return of Ghostface. Considering they're still making Scream movies, I guess Ghostface is as relevant now as he was in 2000.

Based on the comments under the release-date announcement, the one thing that all Scary Movie fans want is the return of Anna Faris as Cindy Campbell and Regina Hall as Brenda Meeks. These two were not in Scary Movie 5 and they were sorely missed. I'm going to assume that the Wayans Brothers will do what they can to bring back these fan favourites. And, based on that assumption, I've developed my own ideas for what they should spoof in Scary Movie 6.

I think the most sensible thing to do (although this series prides itself on its lack of sense) is to frame the story as a Stranger Things parody. Make Cindy and Brenda the mothers of a few kids, like Thursday and Twelve. Make the kids way too old to be believable, just like in the real Stranger Things.
Brenda is married to Ray, and Shorty lives with Cindy. Brenda, Ray, their daughter Thursday, and her friend Twelve go to Cindy's house for Halloween. It's Cindy and Brenda's first time hanging out in years. They find out that Cindy has brainwashed Shorty into being her servant and he can't Get Out of the house. Brenda and Ray fear that Cindy plans to brainwash them too. Brenda explores Cindy's house and, down in the basement, she discovers her own clone that looks just like Us, I mean, her. Brenda's clone kills Brenda and replaces her. Cindy takes one of Shorty's edibles, which he created special for the occasion. On X, it is revealed that Ghostface is back and that he has super hearing. This causes the world to become A Quiet Place, as everyone fears that making too much noise will attract the murderer to their position.

Outside of Cindy's home, the neighbourhood has turned into a ghost town. It's a silent world, where any noise might cause Ghostface to visit you. People walk the streets in eerie silence. Before Cindy can grasp the severity of their situation, the edible kicks in and sends Cindy into the Upside Down.
While there, Cindy encounters Nosferatu and Vecna, who are playing one-on-one basketball.
Meanwhile, in the real world, Ray, Brenda, Shorty, Twelve, and Thursday are trying to avoid drawing Ghostface's attention. They run into other factions that have formed to avoid Ghostface. Doofy runs his own faction, which includes Hanson (aka the "my germs" guy from Scary Movie 2). Doofy is convinced that this is the start of a Civil War and he wants to know what side our heroes are on.

In the Upside Down, Cindy battles for her freedom against Vecna and Nosferatu. She schools them in basketball, before the game breaks down into an all-out fight. They battle through the Upside Down, utilizing guns and kung-fu like they're in the fifth John Wick.
While the gang quietly argue with Doofy and Hanson, Thursday hears a voice in one of the street's gutters. She goes to investigate. Pennywise and Art the Clown are there, and they try to persuade her to join them down below. She's tempted. But, before she can be sucked into this clown-infested underworld, Brenda comes to her rescue, smashing Pennywise's face into the concrete like he's Longlegs.
Things are not going good for Cindy in the Upside Down. She's cornered and the monsters are closing in. However, before Vecna and Nosferatu can kill Cindy, a giant sand worm appears and gobbles up the two monsters. Cindy gets on the back of the worm and rides off.
Brenda and the kids get chased by Doofy's evil faction, but are saved by a one-armed woman named Furiosa who whisks them away in her suped-up muscle car. What follows is a manic chase through this modern wasteland, utilizing sand storms, electric guitars and lots of duster. I don't know how they'll do this on a Scary Movie budget, but I'm not here to concern myself with budget constraints. I'm here to dream!
Furiosa takes Brenda, Ray, Shorty and the kids to a place of solace that is protected from the always-listening Ghostface. It's a beautiful place and the weather reminds one of a July day in Midsommar. This Swedish commune has created some sort of protection from Ghostface's ears. While in the commune, Brenda meets a girl named Pearl. Peal has eyes for Ray, and this does not go over well with Brenda. Brenda calls Pearl a dumb white bitch and they start to fight, before being broken up by the commune leader (possibly Charlie Sheen). The gang discovers that the only downside to this commune is that they want to sacrifice Shorty by burning him alive in a disembowelled bear carcass, to release the marijuana from his body and get the whole group high. However, before he can burn, Twelve saves him with her mind powers (she makes all the cult members crap their pants). This gives our group of heroes enough time to escape.

They travel through a Pet Sematary, where they're finally reunited with Cindy, who pulls herself out of the grave of a dog named Morbius. A large spider, Madame Web, tries to attack them, but Thursday's manic dancing hypnotizes the spider long enough for the gang to escape.
The gang end up at a house in the middle of nowhere, where Daniel Kaluuya (playing himself) is trying to summon aliens. He welcomes the group in and they spend some time drinking tea and playing tether ball. In the house, Thursday discovers M3GAN and the two engage in an epic dance battle. In the other room, things are getting stranger and stranger. They thought Daniel Kaluuya was Daniel Kaluuya, but Nope, he's actually Morgan Freeman after taking The Substance!
Two Mormon missionaries show up and declare everyone Heretics. Twelve warns the group that danger is imminent (her nose is bleeding from railing cocaine with Thursday). Before Twelve's warnings are heeded, an F-35 Lightning II comes shooting through the sky and drops a bomb on the house (a misfire from the ripped and shirtless Top Gun pilot).
Nobody survives but Cindy and Brenda. The police arrive and arrest them. In prison, they begin a romantic relationship like they're Joker and Lady Gaga. They can't help but Smile. Their manic happiness is shortlived, for Ghostface is in the prison and tries to kill them. Turns out that the whole super-hearing thing was fake news and Ghostface was in prison the whole time. Ghostface kills Brenda.
Cindy is left screaming, "noooooo!" into the sky, before Ghostface puts a knife into her back, ending the movie.

Maybe this is what the Wayans Brothers go for. Maybe not. All I know is, I can't wait to see Scary Movie 6.
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