Blue Is the Warmest Color: Never Again in This Life, Nor Possible to Renew

In the drizzle of the evening, I watched Blue Is the Warmest Color, and I felt just like the pervasive "blue" in the film. Both warm and sad, until the final clarity. Then I understood that all unforgettable loves are actually the same: they come rushing towards you with unbelievable magic, heedless of anything else. Before you have time to consider whether you should accept it, it has already begun. The process of falling in love contains unparalleled sweetness and unpredictable bitterness. Saying goodbye is easy, but expressing the inner struggle is extremely difficult. There will always be someone in this world who makes you feel like you own the whole world when you love them, but that person might also make you lose everything in an instant, even yourself, becoming the loneliest person. To me, *Blue Is the Warmest Color* is not just about same-sex love; it's a reflection of many people in love. The reason it shines as a film is not only because of love but also because it shows you a part of yourself you can't see.

The Near-Infinite Transparent Blue: Both "Sunlight" and "Shadow"

Adele first saw the blue-haired Emma under the sun, arm in arm with another girl, and was immediately attracted by her distinct personality. Emma's hair was blue, and her eyes were also a clear blue, with a casually sharp look that could pierce one's soul. A brief encounter, and they remembered each other. Some say: love is not found, but met. In the film, Adele is initially confused about her own sexuality. Like many peers, she doesn't want to be different from others but can't control her attraction to the unique Emma. What is love? Is it for the opposite sex or the same sex? These cannot be premeditated; you understand once you meet and make eye contact.

I particularly liked how the director allowed the love between the two to gradually grow under the sunlight. In the park under a big tree, Emma sketched Adele for the first time. Adele was somewhat uneasy. Her messy hair tied up reflected her mood, always in a mess but still moving forward with hesitation and longing, making her especially charming. Emma's smiling face was relaxed and unrestrained. She wanted to capture the emotions in Adele's eyes rather than a perfect image of her. Or, lying in the sparsely populated greenery, talking freely, naturally getting closer, kissing, sunlight falling on Emma's hair. That near-infinite transparent blue is the color of love. Unfortunately, such blue is only a moment in the process of love. People are inherently complex, and people in love are even more indescribable. Sometimes, the person you fall in love with may not be in the same world as you. The differences between each other are initially the light in the other person, but once in a stable relationship, they turn into shadows. Emma dreams of becoming a famous artist and believes everyone should do what they love; she hopes Adele will become a writer. But Adele only wants to be an ordinary kindergarten teacher, to have a stable job, and to be with Emma. Actually, everyone has different life pursuits. But if you can't enter the world of the one you love, the once dazzling love will eventually fade. Paradoxically, this has nothing to do with love itself but with life's values; yet it does relate to love because if you truly love someone, you might consider their situation and feelings beyond your own ego.

No Matter How Well-Matched Bodies and Souls Are, There Is Still a Gap of "Loneliness"

The most notable part of the film is the over ten-minute-long nude sex scene. The two actresses, Adele Exarchopoulos and Lea Seydoux, performed so well it felt too real to look at directly! The 100% compatibility in their sexual relationship is a key to the depth of their love. For most girls, it's hard to separate sex and love, and the same goes for Adele. She is actually a girl who is quite repressed on the surface. She loves reading long novels, enjoys the imagination that comes from detailed descriptions, and likes inexpensive but delicious spaghetti. She has her own thoughts but always feels inferior in front of Emma, who studies art. Even meeting Emma's family and friends made her nervous and unable to relax.

The only thing that could make her completely relax was the sex with Emma. In their private space, they communicated deeply with their bodies, reaching depths no one else had reached. The body doesn't lie, allowing the repressed Adele to open up completely; her love for Emma is unmistakable. However, even a 100% physical connection cannot bridge the gap in their souls. Adele deeply loves Emma, yet still strays, hurting her. She cries and says, "I was just so lonely." That breakup scene was extremely violent in emotion, but as a viewer, I felt calm and sad because I completely understood Adele's fear. She wanted to get closer to Emma but found she couldn't enter Emma's world no matter how hard she tried. Her loneliness was actually fear, not knowing what to do. Thus, she filled the gap between them with self-destructive behavior. I'm sure everyone will believe that Adele deeply loved Emma when watching this scene. But why would you still hurt someone you truly love? I think sometimes sex has nothing to do with love but with confidence. Lacking confidence in front of Emma, Adele hurt not just Emma but herself as well.

Adele's confusion and helplessness remind me of Naoko in *Norwegian Wood*, who deeply loved her deceased boyfriend but couldn't have a physical relationship with him. Her unresolved emotional issues led to her tragic end. Adele's soul couldn't get close to Emma, just as Naoko's body couldn't get close to her boyfriend. This made me realize that no matter how well-matched bodies and souls are, there is always a gap of "loneliness." Truly achieving 100% unity in love is rare. If you can't coexist with your loneliness, separation is inevitable.

Loving Someone Is Also a Process of Knowing Yourself

The story in the movie is not complicated. Simply put, young Adele falls in love with the very different Emma. They have an amazing sexual relationship and introduce each other to their families and friends. After moving in together, Adele gradually feels their differences. Emma is busy with her own world, and the lonely Adele cheats. Emma finds out and angrily breaks up with her. Three years later, they meet again, feeling like a lifetime has passed. But Emma has moved on, and they do not get back together. The ending is as expected for many breakups. What I want to say is that the scene of their reunion is extremely moving! The result is no longer the key, but the struggle in their eyes. Emma still has love in her eyes, and Adele holds onto a glimmer of hope to rekindle their relationship, but she is still rejected. The sorrow of loving but being unable to love again is truly poignant.

In fact, Emma has indeed forgiven Adele and is still deeply attracted to her, but she just can't be with her again. Not seeing her isn't because she doesn't want to, but because she can't. Not being together isn't because she doesn't love, but because she does. I believe this is Emma's way of loving Adele. She knows they are not suitable and can't erase the shadow of Adele's betrayal. Even if they overcome all obstacles to get back together, the love tainted with shadows won't only be left with sunshine. True love is actually about restraint. Perhaps, having loved deeply and been painfully hurt, you realize that the best way to protect that love is to keep a distance, leaving love in the depths of your heart. I completely understand such an Emma and appreciate her restraint. I've always felt that a love that can come back after betrayal might not have reached the point of heartbreak, still leaving room for retreat, or maybe it hasn't reached the extreme. Before, I found it very sad that love couldn't continue even if you never meet again. But now, I realize that the truest love in life might only retain its warmest colors in memory.

In the later scenes, Adele always wears blue, but Emma no longer has blue hair. Blue, once the warmest color, ultimately becomes a symbol of sadness. But looking at it from another perspective, being able to love until you lose yourself, with regrets and remorse, is also a process of knowing yourself better. Love is both light and shadow, and every lost love teaches you to cherish the next and learn to coexist with loneliness.