Mary and Max: I Want to Become Anyone Except Myself

Mary and Max may be the most simple animated film I have seen this year in terms of production. The character modeling made of clay and the stop-motion technique is rarely seen in movies that promote technology and realism nowadays. But this independent film, without dazzling visual effects, heroic rendering, or large-scale publicity, brings more spiritual shock than any 3D blockbuster. At first glance, this film may seem boring but don't worry. Please calm down your impetuous mood and watch it with a peaceful mind. This film is slow enough to wring your heart and cut straight to the intact scars that you thought were hidden in your nerves. Good medicine is always bitter. If Up is an extraordinary adult fairy tale, then this film is a surgical knife that analyzes our spiritual world.

Max finally said, "I forgive you because you are not perfect, flawless, and neither am I. No one is perfect. Even those who throw things outside the door. When I was young, I wanted to be anyone but myself. Dr. Bernard Hazelhoff said that if I were on a desert island, I would have to adapt to living alone with only coconuts and me. He said I had to accept myself, my shortcomings, and everything about me. We can not choose our shortcomings, but they are also part of us. However, we must adapt to them. But we can choose our friends. I am glad to have chosen you. Everyone's life is a very long sidewalk. Some are very tidy, while others, like me, have cracks, banana peels, and cigarette butts. Your sidewalk is like mine but without as many cracks as mine. Someday, I hope our sidewalks will intersect, and we can share a can of condensed milk. You are my best friend. You are my only friend.”

I have repeated this dialogue over and over again, and I have almost memorized it.

The beginning of the movie, like Amelie, introduced the profiles of two people with contrasting tones, and the story developed along these two colors. The two people, who had no intersection, one living in Melbourne and the other in the United States, started communicating by chance. They were very similar, loved chocolate, liked noble animations, lived in lonely corners of the city, were extremely lacking in love, had few friends, rarely smiled, and were difficult to approach in the eyes of others. Mary was born with a birthmark on her forehead, which made her self-conscious, while Mark suffered from mental illness and spent his days with imaginary friends and goldfish.

Crossing geographical boundaries, their virtual encounter allowed them to find the person who understood them the most. They kept pouring out their thoughts and understanding about society, love, friendship, sex, and the spiritual world through letters and constantly introduced their preferences and experiences to each other. They talked about everything they couldn't say in their daily lives and comforted each other. A sincere friendship gradually grew, and letters from each other became the most anticipated thing in their lives. They embraced each other in the tilted and cold world, becoming each other's most loyal support.

Mark's experiences were more abundant since he was already 44 years old. So when Mary mentioned some sensitive topics, Mark was shattered; his mouth was like a stapler and he couldn't speak. "Have you ever been teased?" "Have you ever loved someone? Have you ever made love?" These innocent questions were like knives that dug out the pain hidden deep in Mark's memory, making him anxious and forcing him to face himself again. He seemed to see his childhood and awkward adolescence in Mary.

When Mark's heart was being put into the washing machine and being crushed, were you also touched by Mary's questions? Could you answer her questions? Did you also feel the same? When you take off your suit, do you also have scars? Adults have a fortress that they think is strong, but only innocence can make it collapse. Young Mary had a crush on her neighbor and longed for love and sex, but was repeatedly hurt by love. She told Mark, "I know love makes me unbearable, so I don't want to try it. I don't think love is prepared for me." Her life was full of changes. She lost her parents, lost her lover, and almost lost her friend Mark. But in the end, Mark forgave her because he believed that he did not choose the wrong friend. He only had this one friend. And just when Mary was almost desperate about life, it was the forgiveness of this old friend that allowed her to stand up again. In fact, in these fleeting 20 years, their friendship had already been honed to be indestructible, even surpassing the love and even the family that Mary had.

The final scene of the film is the most touching moment in the entire movie. After many years, Mary finally gathered the courage to find Marx, only to discover upon entering the house that Marx had peacefully left this noisy world and was sitting on the couch. Marx had the little book used to identify facial expressions on him, indicating that he was ready to welcome his old friend. Marx had covered the room's ceiling with letters from Mary over the years, neatly and perfectly preserved, making it clear that time had passed quietly before them. The old typewriter also became a symbol of their friendship, sitting in the sunshine by the window. At that moment, Mary looked at everything and burst into tears. I think that in the process of exchanging their hearts, they had long understood what love was and practiced it more greatly and memorably than others.

We spend our whole lives exploring the value of friendship. Some say friendship is the most enduring, while others say it is fragile. Love, friendship, and family always appear as multiple-choice questions in front of us, and different people will give different answers. Actually, the most important thing in the process of getting along with others is yourself. There is a saying, "You are what you are, and your world is what you are." You must be able to completely open up before you can gain the trust and recognition of others. This may be risky, but it is also the price that must be paid in this life.

Just like in this movie, Mary didn't even know who was on the other end of the letter, but she gave her true self, and in return, she received equal treatment and true friendship. Modern people have a strong sense of self-protection, and in the process of choosing friends, many people always pursue so-called perfection and set many standards for themselves. They are reluctant to open up and give their hearts easily. Parents also often come out and say, "So-and-so is not a good kid, don't play with him." These are all pathological ideas, like a wall blocking the passage between hearts. "This kind of hedgehog will even bring injuries to those who have treated me well." We don't make friends for temporary pleasures, nor for personal gain, nor do we pursue so-called "equality." What we need is the most inner communication. The friends we need are not those who accompany us to eat, drink, and play every day but abandon us when we lose everything, but those who can give us a slap when we make mistakes, block the knife for us when we are being attacked, and accompany us through a long street when we are most confused, understanding our innermost thoughts without speaking a word.

In fact, friendship is about finding another self, because you are the only one who will not betray yourself.